Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Exceptions to the Rule are Few!

As much as I loved the last forward I got, (and I shared it) I am not a big fan of Forwards at all. Only once a while do I actually read something that I like.....

Here I share an old post from MS.....with the help of my friends C&P!...Hope u like this one :)

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Email…ah THE life line, I would be so lost without it. Its my link to my loved-family, my oh-my-god-why family, my loved-friends, my why-do-you-bother friends, my Boss, my co-workers and sometimes a connection to myself….come on…don’t pretend…haven’t you mailed yourself??? Even to send an attachment??? Never?? Ok now I am ashamed :)

With the life line comes a major thorn .....forwards they are like the small enough glass particle, that gets into your skin but doesn’t completely kill you…it just stays there till you evict it.

For me forwards are just like that, not all but MOST of them. Now I will not go into what forwards are ….coz if YOU DON’T KNOW THAT…please quit reading…and send me your email address…and I promise to send you the forward that WILL KILL YOU if you don’t forward it….!

There are various types of forwards….and I will take the trouble of Listing them…for your Pain..I mean your Pleasure!

Types of Forward

The HA HA Forward

These are text jokes, or pictures, or Pictures with Text ..you get the idea. Some of these jokes are of the ‘even-a-3rd-standard-kid w-wont-laugh-at-this’ Category! ….say like a Santa Banta jokes :

Santa (at the ticket counter) : Hi can I get one ticket to the Punjab Mail and one to the Punjab Female?
Clerk: What???
Santa: Yeah my wife also wants to travel !

(you are not allowed to beat me for this! :))

Remedy:
I usually DELETE this email…..at the first chance I get….but now before sending an even more BORING joke and/or a mail threatening the sender (who in this case could be a friend…..or soon to be EX-friend).

The SCARE Forward


You will recognize these, by their very non-non-threatening, message that reads, that So-and So (usually MSN , or Google…oh and most recently ORKUT.) is checking for active users. And you will get deleted if you don’t forward this to all the members in your address book.

Remedy: DELETE…though it does seem that these organizations, HAVE to use this kind of email to check if you are active, you logging in a 100 times a day apparently does not tell them that…Blah!!!


The INCREASE/BOOST forward

You know what I am talking about ….Increase you *Cough* for the guys and *Different Cough* for the girls, boost your S*ex life …blah blah blah…OH really!...can it happen…can some one vouch for that…What a loa*d of BHAISE GOBBAR!....

What gets even more disturbing is why are they sending me forwards to increase my *Cough* that is supposed to be meant for the MANLY man kind???? Is this some Kind of message….or is it some joke?

Remedy: DELETE….or I would consider forwarding it to people who I particularly don’t like….Hey don’t look at me like that….I am just trying to INCREASE and BOOST their Confidence ;) ;)


The CONSEQUENCES forward

You know the one with the Religious overtones……A picture of a god, a prayer..etc…and after the initial goody feeling that the email projects…it takes you Immediately to the DIRE consequences section.

If you don’t forward this…with a long list of Consequences:

Your Cat will turn vegetarian
You will not be invited to the Martian Party
Your dog will stop Licking his *Gullis*
You will not be able to PEE for 2000 years
Your 215th hair will turn Green

And the most famous one of all

You will not find your TRUE LOVE!

Hello….he is already DEAD!...I killed him…for sending me this forward!....

Remedy:
Do I have to repeat this again?? Ok here goes DELETE…..So far, I have not died, my True love hasn’t left me (read above why!), I don’t own a cat…and Dogs will always be dogs…Licking is a part of their existence…sorry even you can't meddle with that!

So that’s that the High and low of the Forwards!...Hope you enjoy it

Oh wait what is this???? Nice…Another forward..!!!

This is the 1500th forward that I have received, which lets me know in oh-so-polite a manner, that unless I forward this mail to a 100,000 people in the next 5 seconds, that my Mother’s Mom’s only Daughter’s only Daughter, will die in the next seven days.

Oh well……For those who have know me for so this long ........

GOODBYE! , just incase I don’t see you again!

6 comments:

eye-in-sty-in said...

Funny! I asked a friend if she got rich after following the instructions on 1 such fwd. She replied by sending me another one. I was stupefied! How does one retort to that?!

Bedazzled said...

hee hee .. good one .. most of the forwards that hit my mailbox are promptly disposed off ..and congrats on the forward-milestone ;-) ..

Bouncing-Bubble said...

lol
another category which bugged me while I was working was those corporate mails. CEO talk. etc. funny post girl! never read this on MS. SO thanks to C & P

udtahaathi said...

;)

You missed another category- African wealth waiting to get transferred to your bank account. All you need to do is share your banking password with them.
I remember how we *coughed* up the humour out of almost enything. Those were good ol' days :)
Btw- once you posted something about male B**bs, i remember....ROFL

Cheers!
~uh~

Mama - Mia said...

hahahahaha!

seriously! so rarely we find really awesome forwrads! rest is just crap!

cheers!

abha

Smita said...

ha ha ha....

Too good a post :D

The only frwds that I read are the ones which are sent by frenz who hardly send any and when they do they send only classic ones :)